Best DM in the Effing World.

Loan Shark by Joshua Rotthaas
https://www.flickr.com/photos/joshuarothhaas/3008967093

 "Up in Boston, we got to play D&D with this one friend of mine," Bronwyn explained, "and, oh man, he is such a good DM. Like, the best."

No problem. Definitely not DM-jealous.

"Oh, that's cool," I replied, definitely not jealous. Or feeling, you know, feelings. Like jealousy. Or odd impulses to punch stranger-DMs in the face.

Bronwyn rested her chin in her hand, dreamily drawing cleric sigils (or something like that) idly on the office desk. "Yeah, he's just so... organized."

I can feel my definitely-not-DM-jealous-smile hardening.

"Like, he draws out these insanely good maps, and has notes on everything, and the game play is just -- just so good!"

"Huh. Well, that's great."

Naw, it can't be jealousy. I mean, how insecure can I be? Maybe the feelings are just menstrual cramps. Or menopause seizures. Yeah, menopause seizures, definitely. Explains the tick.

"Yeah, but then Eric and I played a game with this other DM," and Bronwyn grimmaced, looking at me knowingly. I think. Am I supposed to know something?

"Oh yeah? And how was that?"

"God, terrible! It was just so boring! I swear, we wasted an hour of play talking about loans! Loans!"

I thought of Ham, naturally. Like, lone wolves, right?  My heart sank.  Am I spending too much time letting Ham turn into a wolf, is that it? (I mean, not Ham literally: his D&D character, of course.)

"Like, lone wolves?" I asked, wondering if I maybe misunderstood some sort of Boston lingo for orcs or large construction projects.

"No," Bronwyn said, planting her fists between us, her eyes wide, "Like, literally, loans. Bank loans.  The DM had them rolling for interest rates for like half an hour. It was killing me."

I relaxed completely. As long as lycanthropy was safe in the world, all was well and good. And I felt a little ashamed about my DM jealousy.

"And then Eric and I were like, oh my god, we can't wait to get back to one of Heather's games."

Then I definitely felt ashamed. And motivated.  I was gonna be that DM.

(Um, not the loan one. The other guy.)

***

First, I actually didn't get that jealous. But you know, my ego is pretty giant, I guess. It's a thing.

Second, if you stumbled on this blog and are not in my monthly AD&D game, I apologize, and I can recommend to you a ton of other blogs that will be much better, from tutorials on Adobe software, to social media bots, to Tarot interpretations. But you'll probably want to go elsewhere.

Third, if you are in my AD&D game, YAY! Look! I'm trying to be organized!

I'm going to use this blog to keep track of our games, recount what happened for those who weren't there, and leave info for where we're headed.  I won't lie, it may take me a while to get better at the map thing. Seriously, I apologize. But hey! Progress, right?

As an overview, we're about half-way through The Lost Mine of Phandelver.

In the next post, I'll summarize our last game, and let y'all know where we're at.

(And maybe some day I'll add maps.)